STAFF NOTICE
TO: ALL MEMBERS OF THE STAFF
FROM: TRAINING DEPARTMENT
SUBJECT: ADDITIONAL TRAINING FOR ALL STAFF

  1. It is now, and always has been, the policy of this Office to assure its employees are well trained. Through our SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING programme ( S.H.I.T. for short), we have given our employees more S.H.I.T. than any other office in the area.

    If any employee feels that he or she does not receive enough S.H.I.T. on the job, or that he or she could anvance to another position by taking more S.H.I.T., please see your immediate supervisor.
  2. If you graduate to the top of our list by taking all the S.H.I.T. that is given to you, you can then qualify for our supervisors programme COMPLETE RESPONSABILITY ACTION PROGRAMME (C.R.A.P. for short)..

    So, to become a member of our management team, simply take all the S.H.I.T. you can and then with all the additional C.R.A.P. you receive, you will soon reach the top..

    Any employee who has the initiative and drive to take both S.H.I.T. and C.R.A.P. will soon become one of the elite.
  3. For a limited period only, the Office is offering all employees the chance to try for our latest scheme ADVANCED SUPERVISORY STAFF HELPING OUR LOYAL EMPLOYEES or A.S.S.H.O.L.E. for short..

    So, you work hard, and you will find that the more S.H.I.T. you take and the more C.R.A.P. you can handle, will qualify you as an A.S.S.H.O.L.E. for sure.

 

Open to all members of the staff

 

 Kurioses